#22 Jessi Ramsey, Pet Sitter (or Jessi Ramsey Feels SIck to her Stomach for a Week))

Don’t you just hate it when you can’t find the book you set out to snark?  I think one of the kids ran off with it and now I have no idea where it is.  I read it before they lost it, so I will give this snark my best effort.

A little shout out to the cover: We see a 35 year old Jessi with a couple of kids surrounded by animals and a great dane looking rather superimposed in a random place. 

Jessi is sitting in her room trying to do her homework when Becca comes in and meows at her, wanting to play cat.  Then Ann jumps right into the introduction of the BSC.  It’s not quite to the extent of chapter two just yet, but the descriptions are pretty in-depth.

The next chapter starts with Jessi rushing into the meeting. She’s almost late, not even late, just almost late, but she gets the feeling she should apologize.  Kristy’s in some sort of mood and doesn’t even want Claudia to get her junk food out.  Then the Mancusis call and explain their predicament.  Their pet sitter backed out last minute and they are desperately trying to find a replacement.  Now it just so happens that Jessi’s ballet class is on vacation and the Braddocks (her long term sitting job) aren’t around either, so she has a free week.  She volunteers her time and Kristy is all like, “heck no, we don’t sit no pets” and “I haven’t given you my permission.”  At that point she stops and realizes that she’s going too far, relents, and “allows” Jessi to take the job.  If I were Jessi and Kristy “forbade” me, I would say fine and call the Mancusis later and take the job.  But we’re talking about an 11-year-old with a serious case of hero worship going on here; that’s not going to happen.

Jessi heads to the Mancusis, who have an obscene amount of pets, and we get our token vocab lesson: cacophony.  She meets all the animals and notices one hamster who is fat and alone in the corner.

The next chapter is a Claudia sitting chapter.  She takes Jamie Newton and Nina Marshall to see Jessi and all the Mancusis’ pets.   They all go on a walk with the dogs and run into the Perkins’ dog, Cheewbacca…yawn… Oh, and fat hamster is still fat and sleeping in the corner.

Well, at least the drama in the club is interesting.  Kristy starts being all dictatorish and Claudia calls her out on it.  Kristy’s lame ass excuse is that Charlie’s going to college next year and is bossing the rest of them around.  Heh, Chuck-o, you ain’t going to college for another 20 some years; save the angst.  All the older girls argue and Jessi and Mal sit and look on in horror as they watch their idols tear each other apart. When they leave, Mal points out that they might want the two of them to take sides and that causes more worry.

Another babysitting chapter, another visit to the Mancusis.  Seriously, I wonder how stressed out these animals already are having a stranger caring for them while their owners are away.  Really, is bringing more strangers into the mix a good idea?  Anyway, a snake escapes and girl genius Myriah Perkins figures out where to find him.  Oh, and fat hamster is still fat and sleeping in the corner.

Another club meeting, more drama.  Kristy brings in a checklist to ensure the girls are reading the club notebook.  She pins it over pictures of Claudia and Stacy on Claudia’s bulletin board.  Really, girlfriend, did you not think this through??  I find the club notebook a little annoying unless something important happens or changes with a sitting family, but since it seems that they have to write in it for EVERY SINGLE JOB it’s highly unlikely they aren’t reading it.  And really, right over top of the pics of Claudia’s best friend?  Claud rips Kristy a new one, and eventually all the older girls join in for a nice , rip-roaring fight, during which they all say they don’t like their jobs.  At the end of the day, Kristy calls an emergency meeting for Saturday to vote for new officers.

Jessi and Mal take Becca to the Mancusis and discuss the election while Becca plays with the animals.  They fear the club could break up over this. Oh, and fat hamster is still fat and sleeping in the corner.

Babysitting chapter, involving Kristy and Jackie Rodowski.  Jackie pretty much points out that Kristy is bossy.

She obviously didn’t learn her lesson because at the next meeting she dictates down to the letter how the elections are going to run.  There are tears from MA, which Dawn blames Kristy for.  Best line in the book:  “Look what I did?  I didn’t do that!  MA cries all the time!  She does it by herself!”  hehe….why yes, Kristy, you’re right on that one.  Everyone leaves as Kristy bellows that they should all be back the next day.  At four.  On the dot.  No tardiness.  No one is listening anymore, Kristy.

The next day Jessi talks to her mom before she goes pet sitting.  She wants her mother to tell her how to vote, but Mama doesn’t.  She tells Jessi to make up her own mind.  With that parental bit of wisdom (which I use myself from time to time) floating in her brain., she goes to feed the Mancusis’ pets and decides to try to touch fat antisocial hamster and almost gets bit….okay, time to take this pet to the vet!  She calls her mother, who bundles up Squirt and comes tot take her to the vet.  It is, of course, running up against the special meeting, so Jessi calls Kristy, who (rather kindly) reschedules the meeting. Turns out the hamster is prego.  Jessi puts her in an empty cage alone and just needs to wait for the babies.

Jessi wakes up early the next morning to take care of the Mancusis’ pets before they get home that day.  Then she heads to the emergency meeting, which is rather anticlimactic, with everyone voting themselves into their old offices.  Then they all go to the Mancusis’ house and watch the hamster give birth…then the other girls bug out because they shouldn’t be there when the Mancusis come home.  Hmmmm….perhaps you shouldn’t be there in the first place??  Anyway, they come home and offer Jessi a baby hamster in addition to the money they’re paying her.

The last chapter.  Hallelujah.  Everything’s back to normal.  Kristy puts up another checklist as a joke and ripping it up.  Um, haha?  Mal calls her parents to ask if they can have a hamster, which is supposedly their first pet, but in book one it was stated that they have a cat.  Anyway, everyone is happy and the hamsters will have a good home.

This was actually a boring book.  It was one of my faves as a kid, but I, yeah.  I can’t say that I miss my lost copy all that much.

The BSC in the News

Check out this link to the latest article about the Babysitter's club.   I find it extremely ironic that the interviewee talks about the "bible" they had of information for the series so not a thing would be messed up in the writing of the series when there are countless blogs and snarks pointing out just that.

#14 Hello Mallory

I’m Tess and I’m going to try my hand at snarking.  Poor Mallory hasn’t been singled out for a snark yet, so I thought I’d start with her.  She’s the only member of the club that is singled out to be unattractive and nerdy; I suppose they can’t all be gorgeous with luscious skin or radiant eyes or dead mothers.  Let the Mallory abuse begin!

I liked Rae’s shout out to the cover; there are some interesting ones in the series.  This cover has 16 year old Mallory playing with the Perkins girls while a 35 year old Claudia takes notes in the background.  C’mon now Hodges, the time warp hasn’t started yet!

The book starts with Mallory listing all the different names for glasses.  Yawn, I’m bored already. C’mon Ann, at least give a little effort into making her interesting!  Then we have the description of the Pike hoard.  Poor Dee must have been pregnant almost constantly for 6 years to have their ages work out.  All of the kids are described as having blue eyes and chestnut hair; I’m not sure when Mal’s is changed to red.  For being strict parents, they apparently have no problem with hair dye.  We move on to hearing about the BSC and how they are thinking of asking Mallory to join.  Stacy moved back to NYC and since Mal loves kids and babysits her own brothers and sisters from time to time, she seems a logical choice.  Currently she’s in charge of Claire and Nicky, along with Buddy Barret, who’s over to play.  The boys are playing volleyball and when the triplets come home, Nicky loses focus, gets hit with the ball and breaks some fingers.  Mallory is in charge of all the kids while mom and pop Pike take Nicky to the hospital.

Mallory takes great care with her clothes the next day since she’s going to the BSC meeting that afternoon and can hardly focus.  She does manage to notice that there is a BLACK girl sitting next to her.  Maybe it’s just because this is Milwaukee that I don’t get why most people found this to be a big deal.  Maybe suburban Connecticut has fewer minorities running around, which would account for the reactions, although we weirded out all the new kids that came to school mid year.  Anyway, Mal decides she needs a best friend, and the new girl (Jessica) is it!

Mallory makes it to the meeting and we get the general chapter two stuff.  They set up a test job with the Perkins girls for Mallory and Claudia and then Mal starts bragging up taking care of her siblings while Nicky was taken to the hospital.  The girls immediately jump all over her for “letting” Nicky break his finger.  That’s right, Mal, you should have used your anytime minutes to call the psychic networks to that she knew the exact second to jump when the ball went awry.  The older girls decide she needs to take a test and pass her test job to join the club.  Someone mentions that a black family moved into Stacy’s old house…

The next day is the test and Mallory leaves early, swinging past Stacy’s old house.  Jessi is outside with her sister and brother and Mal stops in to say hi.  They get along really well and Jessi pronounces she’s going to be a ballet dancer when she grows up (contrary to other books where she’s not going to be a professional dancer…seems to flip flop a little).

Mal has to run for the test and arrives on time.  The test is a total sham – this is stuff I wouldn’t expect anyone to know off the top of their heads, like the average age a baby cuts their first tooth or the difference between creeping and crawling.  I can’t really say I care if my sitter knows those little tidbit; I’d prefer she be able to dial 9-1-1 in an emergency and keep the kids from killing each other.  During the test, Mr. Perkins calls and announces his wife just had Perkins Prodigy #3, Laura Elizabeth.  By the end of the test, Mal knows she has failed and knows she needs to do well at her sitting job.

Of course the job goes “awful” for Mallory.  Claudia butts in a little bit and scolds Mal in front of Myriah and Gabbie for her handling of snack, for letting Chewy into the house, for asking Gabbie if she’s excited to see her sister and getting tears in response.  None of these things are a big deal, but Claudia makes them out to be that day and at the next meeting.

The girls are pretty hard on Mal and by the end of the meeting they haven’t decided if they want her to join or not.  In fact, they propose another test.  Mal’s had a enough of this nonsense and tells them to shove off.

Mal mopes along and runs into Jessi at school.  They pour out their woes to each other and decide to start their own club.  They pretty much copy the BSC, although they have kind of a neat name in “Kids Incorporated.”  It’s actually fitting since they ARE kids starting this business.  They offer two sitters for the price of one since they’re so young and can’t sit at night, just a little incentive to entice customers.  (Doesn’t really matter, I still wouldn’t hire 11 year olds to watch my kids).  Their first job is to sit together for the Pike brood on Saturday. 

Lo and behold Ms. Dawn Schafer is sitting for the Barretts the same day and not only sees the flier for the Kids Incorporated club, she sees Mal and Jessi sitting at the Pikes.  She tells the rest of the girls at their next meeting and they don’t know what to do.

Aside from their job with the Pikes, Mal and Jessi aren’t getting any jobs outside of their own families.  Kristy calls and pretty much just insults Mal, who doesn’t take any of it.

Jessi has been having trouble adjusting to the white neighborhood and the inevitably nasty people who will not like black people.  There is an episode of a neighbor mother calling her daughter back home when she comes over to see Becca’s bubble blowing contraption, BUT Charlotte J comes over with treats and starts to play with Becca.  Some things just take a little time.

The BSC is in trouble.  They have too many jobs and not enough sitters.  Obviously they need Mallory in the club.  They decide the were unfair and decide to call Mallory and ask for another chance.  Mal agrees, on the condition that Jessi be allowed to come too.

They go to the club meeting and set up test jobs for Mal and Jessi.  Jessi brings up the sticky point that not everyone in Stoneybrook is happy she’s black and she doesn’t want to hurt the club.  Kristy says they’ll deal with that when the time comes and that if clients of theirs don’t want Jessi to sit for them, she doesn’t really want to sit for them either.  This does come up in “Keep out, Claudia” and the girls do put their money where their mouth is.

Mallory sits for the Newtons with Claudia and does great.  She easily handles all the situations that come up and even lets the Perkins girls come over to play (Seriously, what is it with these sitters having every kid in the neighborhood over when they sit??) not to mention keeping her cool when the repair man shows up to fix the washing machine.  Claudia is impressed and says that she’s sure Mallory is in.  The end.

This book was weird to snark, just because Mallory wasn’t really in the club and the way it’s written is just…awkward.  Yeah, you know, just like Mal is.  Poor Mallory.

SAHM Portrait Collection: Bonnie

My first child refused to nurse.  (Great opening line, huh?)  My mom had sent me my collection of BSC books so I read them while I was pumping.  I was missing a bunch and in my curiosity to know the later plotlines, I stumbled across some grade A snarks.  Soon I was hooked.  I finally thought that I had read enough snarks and that I'm a sarcastic enough person to think I could snark a bit and put it on a blog  I really wanted to look at these books from a parental perspective, because I know a lot of snarkers out there aren't parents and it puts a different spin on things once you are.  I posted my first post and instantly knew I wasn't going to be able to keep up with it, so I asked my other mommy friends (who are also very sarcastic...irony...) if they wanted to help me out.  And so, we have the blog.  Another friend of ours is going to be joining soon; you'll meet Tess in the next snark.
A bit about me.  I'm the youngest of 5 by a lot, so I babysat nieces and nephews when I was a kid. (Sidebar: I'm going to be a great aunt in December and I just turned 30 last week.  YIKES!).  I used to teach; in my experiences, I have taught preschool through 8th grade at some point in time.  Because of my teaching experiences, I decided to stay home when we had children.  So I now stay at home with our girls and there are days where I wish the BSC did exist so that I could go to the grocery store without having to worry about buckling two kids in carseats, unbuckling two kids in carseats, loading two kids into a cart, keeping one kid out of the purse and the other from destroying the aisle displays...you get the idea.

#44 Dawn and the Big Sleepover (or, Dawn and the Lawsuit Just Waiting to Happen)

 Now I get to snark a book I like.  I enjoyed this one as a kid.  I thought it would be cool to have a pen pal, just for the simple reason I like getting mail.  I also thought all the fundraising ideas sounded fun.  Ha!  Fun, fund…don’t give me that look!  Anyway, it is ghostied by Peter Lerangis and is the 3^rd time through 8^th grade for these young ladies.

Before we jump into the fun that is this book, we need to stop for a shout out about the cover.  It is blaze orange (my ’91 copy anyway) and we see Dawn looking like she’s described in the books, for once.  She also appears to be grabbing some girl chest, even though I think she’s supposed to be breaking up a fight…

So we start with Dawn sitting at the Pike’s with Mallory, of course, and the kids are jumping all over, reading their letters from their pen pals.  Who are these pen pals?  Zunis!  Yeah, that’s just how it’s written in the book.  It’s a group of Native Americans in New Mexico and, according to Wikipedia, the tribe actually exists.  Excellent work, Peter Lerengis!  You used a group of people that actually exist!  By the end of the chapter, the kids have decided to send some stuff from Stoneybrook in their next letters….didn’t realize Stoneybrook was big enough to have bumper stickers and decals.

Sensitive Mary Anne looks up at Dawn when she gets home and assumes the worst, but no, Dawn’s just bummed about not having a pen pal.  This must be pretty devastating to Dawn, considering Mary Anne just looks at her and sees that something’s wrong.  Blar de blar, chapter two stuff and suddenly Dawn’s famished and happy again. 

Uh-oh, Mal’s late for Monday’s meeting and Kristy pulls the rack out of the closet.  Discipline must be swift and fierce!  But then Mal comes in and drops a bomb – the Zunis’ school burned down after a gas station explosion.  No kidding, one of my biggest fears after reading this book was being at a gas station when it blew up.  Thank you, Ann and Peter.

Dawn wants to do something to help, calls Mal that night, who is helping comfort crying kids, and pretty much doesn’t do anything helpful to cheer anyone up.  But Dawn starts thinking and decides to have a food and clothing drive.  Mary Anne’s all, “That’s a lot of work – what teacher is going to want to do that?”  Dawn thinks long and hard and decides, “Why not Ms Besser?  She had Jeff in her class two cycles ago and he was an absolute terror before moving back to Cali.  She’ll be really happy to hear from his crazy sister (whom she met in book 14? 15? But they pretend in this book that they haven’t met….oh, continuity errors!).  Amazingly enough the woman does NOT slam the phone down on the crazy girl calling on the weekend and agrees to take up the project.

Dawn tells Kristy (big chance she took, telling her great idea to the queen of great ideas.  It’s like Snow White telling her stepmom how pretty she herself is.) and Kristy calls the club together half an hour earlier for Operation Help.  Of course, the club members are enthusiastic about spending every waking minute helping with the fundraising and they decide there needs to be some kind of reward.  A GIANT SLEEPOVER!  What could be more fun than 100 kids crammed in a smelly gymnasium…to me as a parent, the idea has pedo-bear written all over it.

All 7 girls are excused from morning classes to head over to SES for an assembly (genius Charlotte’s idea!) to announce the plan.  Best quote in the book: “and as an experienced baby-sitter, I knew those kids were not all angels." It took you 13 years to figure that out, did it Dawn?  You didn’t realize it as YOU were sitting in the assembly as a kid?  Anyway, they are met with resounding excitement from the students.  The prizes are especially exciting to them, which may lead to some problems later…

The kids get creative with their fundraising.  The Pikes hold a carnival in the backyard (really Peter….er….Dawn?  You don’t know what a free throw is?  You have a father and a brother, yes?), there is a yard sale that goes horribly awry (kids donate items without asking the ‘rents…oops.  Most of them are pretty generous and just buy their stuff back since it’s for a good cause.), and Haley Braddock dresses up as Madame Leveaux and tells fortunes (Yeah, wow…don’t know what to say about that one).  May I just take a moment to say that I really hate how badly the writers, ghosties especially, murder Claudia’s spelling.  I get she hates school, but really?  She can’t use the correct spelling of the word sale?

After the yard sale disaster, Dawn starts going through the donations and finds really nice stuff, such as a brand new suit and caviar. Yeah, caviar.  More parents become upset that the kids are giving their stuff away without asking, so the girls come up with a permission slip that must be turned in with donations.  I get that a kid or two will get carried away trying to win prizes, so much so that they clear out the house.  It just seems like parents would be involved with this a bit more so that the issue wouldn’t be so widespread.  More like, “Hey, let’s go through everyone’s stuff, maybe buy some groceries for you to drop off” rather than “Good luck, hope you find what you’re looking for.”

Everything finishes on the up and up and it’s time for the big night.  There are the to be expected issues, like the pizza place trying to cancel their large gratis order of pizzas, the CD player not working, homesick kids.  But the night goes pretty well as a whole, the kids love the prizes and apparently they have collected an astronomical amount of money to send to the Zunis, so astronomically high it couldn’t be put into print.

The girls get the kids ready for bed and start tucking them in.  As Dawn’s tucking in a 2^nd grader, he asks, “Is Johnny going to have dinners, too, now?”  Well, rip my heart out with a flipping spoon.  I sat and cried over that one for awhile. 

And before the babysitters hit the hay, Ms. Besser delivers this line: “Do me a favor.  Would you mind staying exactly the same age for a few years until I have a child old enough to be baby-sat for?”  Ahhh, the dramatic irony.  If only Ms. Besser knew this was already Dawn’s third time through 8^th grade.

They wrap up the party the next morning and ship off all of the goods.  They used the “phenomenal” amount of money raised to ship it and what wasn’t used for shipping was sent in a check.  There are many heartfelt letters of thanks ending the book.

It was a nice story, decently done, and with the exception of a few parents with their heads in the clouds, they seemed pretty supportive of the whole thing. 

#3 The Truth About Stacy

Ah, Tory does a Stacy book.  I don’t think I ever really got into Stacy as a kid; I was more of a Kristy girl.  Maybe I was turned off by the “NYC sophistication” that was in every book.  She’s a bit more palatable in the earlier books…that seems to be the mantra with this series.

This book begins with the four girls of the BSC planning what to do when Mrs. Newton has her baby.  Yeah, because, you know, they’re on her speed dial….I think this might have been written before speed dial…anywho, Janine runs into the room and shoves a flier at the girls advertising a new babysitting agency.  The agency has older sitters who can stay out later and lower rates...dun, dun DUN!  Kristy immediately turns the meeting into an emergency meeting. (Which I don’t get – you’re already meeting, why make it an emergency?)  They call the agency pretending to need a sitter just to see how things work and they find not only do they have older sitters, but they have boy sitters as well.

Stacy heads home and we get a synopsis of how she found out about her diabetes. Continuity: This book actually does a really good job depicting type 1 diabetes.  It talks about how Stacy can eat sweets, but she has to eat on a schedule and be very careful.  Later, the writers start saying she can’t eat sweets at all and distorts diabetes a lot.  Her parents found out they couldn’t have any more children just before the diagnosis and suddenly have become over protective, which I can understand.  They’ve also started dragging Stacy to all kinds of different doctors trying to cure the diabetes.  I’m impressed by how many doctors they can find in a pre internet era.  Anyway, they hid the diabetes from friends, including Stacy’s former best friend Lanie Cummings.  The illness drove a wedge between them and by the end of the 6^th grade year, Stacy was pretty friendless.  Mommy Moment:  I think the McGills actually did something smart by moving out of the city and finding a new place for Stacy to start over.  Where they were a little dopey was dragging her from doctor to doctor instead of just getting her diabetes under control and letting her adjust to having a disease.

So on top of competing with the Babysitter’s Agency, Stacy’s parents announce that they’re taking her to another doctor.  She flips, of course, because she’s tired of being sick and hauled around from doctor to doctor, but her parents stand firm. 

The next day there’s another BSC meeting to plan on how to compete with the Agency.  Here is the birth of the kid kit, which is a pretty neat idea.  Then we have offering to do housework, special rates for good clients, lower rates, and asking Janine and Charlie to help out.  The last one trips Claudia’s trigger and she puts her foot down and they end up starting with special deals and kid kits.

Stacy goes to sit for Charlotte Johanssen the next week with her kid kit.  Miss Charlotte is having trouble in school socially, setting up an additional subplot.

Mrs Newton has her baby, a girl named Lucy.  Jamie stays at the Thomas house and they have a big brother party for him.  At the party, he lets slip that Mrs. Newton is going to hire the Agency to take care of Lucy because she’s so little.  Mommy Moment: Honestly, I would want an older sitter for my newborn as well.  I didn’t leave my son with anyone under the age of 20 until he was a year old.

The Agency ramps up the war by recruiting more kids from the middle school, so the BSC fires back.  The girls walk around school wearing sandwich boards recruiting new sitters for the club. Kristy gets two recruits, who “used to be part of the agency, but got sick of Liz and Michelle.”  Common sense moment:  Really girls?  That doesn’t strike you as the least bit suspicious?  Of course, they are assigned BSC jobs and don’t show up for them.  Kristy is crushed (or should I say Krushed) and starts thinking up new ways to advertise.

Meanwhile, Jamie Newton is sad about his new sitters and even shows Stacy a cigarette burn mark on a chair Mommy Moment: Seriously?  I get you’re sleep deprived, Mrs. N, but you couldn’t smell the smoke in your house? Charlotte too continues to be sad and even lashes out at Stacy, since her new sitters don’t really like her; just hang out with her for the money.  Stacy advises her to talk to her parents about not liking her sitters and about being upset at school.  Stacy has also talked to Doc J about the doctor her parents are taking her to.  Stacy’s plan is to go to their doctor and then to go to one of her own choosing.  She’s asked Doc J to help her find a good doctor and make an appointment with him/her.

Stacy then takes charge and calls an emergency meeting of the BSC.  She tells them about Jamie and Charlotte and they decide to encourage the kids to tell their parents what their new sitters have been up to.  This is cemented when they’re heading home and find Jamie Newton wandering around by the road with no hat or coat (it’s December in Connecticut).  The girls actually talk to their parents (GASP!) about what to do and they decide to talk to Mrs. Newton after that one.  They tell her about everything that has been happening and encourage her to talk to Jamie about it.

The next day the BSC take on Liz and Michelle and show them what good babysitters are like.  They just end up ticking them off and nothing is really resolved at that point.

The next day Stacy leaves for NYC and her new doctor.  Guess who they’re staying with?  The Cummings! Dun, dun DUN!  People we never hear from again: The Spencers: Aunt Beverly and Uncle Lou, parents to Jonathan and Kirsten and the McGills: Aunt Carla and Uncle Eric, parents to Cheryl, who is apparently a pain.

The first day with the new doctor is fairly unexciting.  Stacy goes through a bunch of tests, never even sees the doctor.  She and her parents go out after the day is over and she hands them a letter from Doc J announcing she has an appointment with a very good doctor.  Her parents are a bit miffed (as well they should be) but they go along with it and head out to the doctor.  All he really does is tell the McGills to calm down where Stacy is concerned and let her have a little more control over her body.  Ed and Maureen agree and schedule an appointment with Stacy’s regular doc just for a check up before they go home.

That night they go out to the movies with the Cummings’ and Lanie and Stacy are stuck next to each other.  Stacy goes to get a snack (which, might I add, is $1.75 for 1 small popcorn and 1 small soda) and realizes she doesn’t have enough money.  Lanie covers her and suddenly they’re talking again.  Stacy explains what happened, Lanie explains her side and then the movie is over and they are friends again.  YAY!

When Stacy gets home, she finds out the Agency is kaput and gets to sit for Lucy Newton, while Mrs. Newton is at home, but still, it’s a start.  Then she goes home and Lanie calls to talk.  Everything is resolved!  The BSC is safe!  Stacy is happy!  The End!

Best Quote Ever

• “For one thing, I wouldn’t trust them farther than I could throw a truck,” said Claudia.  “They have smart mouths, they sass the teachers, they hate school, they hang around at the mall.  You know, that kind of kid.”   I didn’t realize being a bad kid meant hanging around the mall.  If that were the case, I should have been in juvie by the time I was 11.

#7 Claudia and Mean Janine

I really liked Claudia, except for her relationship with Janine.  This book is supposed to be Janine being mean to Claudia, but I really never saw it.  Even as a kid I thought it should have been called Mean Claudia and Janine.  Anyway, let’s get started.

We start off at the Kishi house on a morning in July.  Claudia is getting ready for her art class and tells us she doesn’t like school, but loves art.  Claudia’s sister Janine is a genius but Claudia really just thinks she’s a big dork.  Mrs. Kishi says Claudia isn’t fair sometimes – that inside, Janine is sensitive and loving and creative in her own way but Claudia doesn’t look past the big words to see it.  She also says Janine wishes she was more like Claudia with lots of friends and interests and that’s why she teases Claudia.  Woo-hoo!  Go Mrs. Kishi!  If only that sank in with Claudia…

But then Claudia admits she’s a disappointment to her parents because academics are important to them and she’s interested in art.  We meet Mimi, Claudia’s beloved grandmother.  After this, we get the later chapter 2 summary in 2 pages and then Janine asks Claudia how the club will work with Kristy moving – only in Sheldon type language.  Claudia explodes and Janine huffs off, but she leaves feeling rather hurt.

That night at the club meeting Kristy explains that her older brother Charlie is happy to drive her to club meetings at a low price.  Then she unveils her new great idea: a summer playgroup for the month of July.  Stacy volunteers her house, her parents okay it and the latest business of the BSC is born!

They spend the next few days handing out fliers and recruiting kids; even “little” Mallory Pike will be coming each day as a helper.  Kristy pitched this idea as a way for kids on summer break from school to get rid of their summer boredom; I find it ironic that most of their attendees are not yet in school.

The night before camp starts Claudia and Mimi make dinner while the elder Kishis are out; Claudia is to ask Janine if she wants waffles, but she rather informs her sister and they have a little tiff.  Dinner itself goes well with Mimi putting out fires between the girls before they get too hot.  After dinner Janine suggests the trivia game.  Honestly Janine, do you think this is going to end well?  Short story: they play, the genius wins, Claudia has a fit, Janine storms off, Mimi scolds Claudia and then heads for bed.

Claudia goes to apologize to Janine when they hear a giant thump and they discover Mimi on the floor in her room.  They call 9-1-1, Mimi is rushed to the hospital and Claudia stays home to tell her parents when they arrive.  The diagnosis is a stroke, a pretty severe stroke considering the only symptom she had before passing out was fatigue.  My father had a stroke several years ago and he not only had fatigue, but dizziness and weakness on one side.  Suddenly the right side of his face started to droop and we took him in.  He had a pretty mild stroke though.

Claudia goes to playgroup in the morning and tells the club members about Mimi.  The kids all make get well cards for Mimi and the sitters complain about Jenny Prezzioso, which seeing as she’s not sharing, refusing to wear a smock over her white lacy dress and is being rude to other children, I can live with.

Later that day Claudia sits for the Newtons and notices Jamie’s jealousy of Lucy.  She also notices just how much he loves her.  They run into Janine outside the Kishi’s house and here starts the most ridiculous exchange in the whole book.  My take, of course, since Ann would never use salty language:

Claudia: “How was your day?”

Janine: “It was very exciting-”

Claudia: “You callous, insensitive bitch!”

Janine: “What?

Claudia: “You didn’t immediately ask about Mimi or Mom.  Or the Dali Lama for that matter!”

Janine: “You asked me how my day was.  You didn’t give me a chance to ask about them.  Besides, I called Mom and found out how Mimi is.  She’s doing okay.”

Claudia: “You Toadcrud!  Why didn’t you tell me?”

Janine: “You didn’t give me a chance.”

Claudia: “May you live 1000 years in a fungus encrusted cave with hippie yippie crabscrod as your only friends." (raises hand to slap Janine)

Then Claudia has the gall to say Janine ruined her afternoon.  Um, Claud?  Other way around, dearest.

That night after the club meeting and dinner, the Kishis go to see Mimi, who just woke up.  The tubes and wires freak Claudia out and she isn’t able to spend much time in the room.  The next night they go back and Claudia has psyched herself up to stay and talk.  She is talking with Mimi and notices her blinking.  The two of them begin a little blink code and everyone in the family is able to communicate with Mimi.  Later at home, Claudia sees Janine crying at her computer.  To give Claudia some credit, she does call out to her, but Janine doesn’t seem to hear so she leaves.

Playgroup is continuing on and sweet precious little Karen Brewer comes with Andrew for a day.  Karen tells everyone Andrew will turn into a monster at 10am and all the children flee from him.  Well, 10 rolls around, Andrew is normal, but Jenny P is still afraid.  So the sitters have Andrew tell her to wear her smock every day and she agrees to do so.  Way to go sitters!  Rather than do something yourselves, you have one child terrify another into compliance.  Woo-hoo!

We come into the next scene finding Claudia making dinner, feeling guilty about giving Mimi the stroke.  Her parents come in and tell her they have good news and to get her sister.  Segue into the next most ridiculous conversation in the book.

 Claudia: “Thanks for helping me with dinner.”

Janine: “What? I didn’t know you were starting dinner.”

Claudia: “It’s 6pm.  What did you think I was going to be doing?  Knitting a sweater? ”

Janine: “Why did you come into my room?”

Claudia admits she feels bad after this confrontation because she didn’t bother to ask Janine to help or tell her she was planning to start dinner.  Remember that next time Claudia.

The good news is that Mimi is out of intensive care, starting to feed herself and attempting to speak.  They go to visit her and she is able to write that she is happy to see them.  The words and letters are all mixed up, which scares Claudia, but the doctors seem happy with her progress.  She’s going to start occupational therapy and the doctors think more family stimulation will help her, plus when she comes home, she’ll need someone to stay with her.  Janine starts to talk, but Claudia railroads her and volunteers her mornings, giving up the playgroup.  After all, she did give Mimi the stroke.

The next day’s playgroup is foreshadowing about Kristy’s new neighborhood when her collie Louie is brought over and needs a bath.  She’s worried about the snobby people and is afraid they aren’t going to like Louie….ahem, ahem, the Thomas kids.  They give Louie a bath and gussy him up a bit for his debut to high society.

Claudia continues to work with Mimi, who gets the green light to go home.  Who volunteers to stay with her?  Claudia, of course!  Is Janine even consulted?  Nope.  Claudia is sure she’ll be glad since all she’s done since Claudia started working with Mimi is bury her nose in a book and hardly talk to anyone else.  Perhaps the fact she can never get a word in edgewise is why she’s pulling even more into her shell???

The first day with Mimi home goes well and she and Claudia get into a routine, with the exception of one day with Mary Anne, where Mimi ends up yelling at her.  I’ll let her have that one; when a little girl you watched grow up is watching you, it’s a little embarrassing.  Again, did they ask Janine if she could help out??  Anyway, Mimi is improving, but there are some things she’ll never be able to do again, which is rather sad.  Nothing much snarkable there.

Claudia sits for the Newtons again so that Mrs. Newton can get everything ready for baby Lucy’s christening party, which, of course, the BSC will be attending and assisting at.  Eeesh!  I wish they had been around for my girls’ baptisms; it would have saved me a lot of time and hassle.  My mom was here and helped a lot though.

The day of the christening arrives; all goes well at the church and things are humming along at the party until it’s time for the gifts.  Jamie gest presents as well as Lucy, but they’re smaller and he’s jealous, so it doesn’t go well.  Then he starts vying for attention, but not getting any.  The end result is that he nearly dumps a pitcher of punch on his sister, but stops at the last minute because he loves her.  Claudia does the plot contrived comparison between Jamie and Lucy and her and Janine and shock of shockers discovers she loves her sister!

She gets home from the party, finds Mimi alone and proceeds to duke it out with her sister.  This time, she has an actual beef since Mimi isn’t supposed to be left alone and Janine did just that.  Conversation:

Claudia pounds on door

Janine: “Is something wrong?”

Claudia: “Mimi is downstairs ALONE!!!!”

Janine: “I’ve been right here.”

Claudia: “You’re supposed to be with her.  Can’t you do anything right in this family?”

Janine: “Go away, nobody wants me in this family anyway.”

Claudia: “WTF?”

Janine: “You’re always pushing me into my world.  Janine, go study, don’t neglect schoolwork.  Nobody asks me to do anything or to help them, then you come in here and go postal on me for dumping more work on you!”

Claudia: “But you do!”

Janine: “No, you volunteered your mornings, interrupting me.  Why was Mary Anne asked to be here when I could have stayed?  No one told me, no one asked me, no one let me speak.  It’s as if I don’t exist.”

That’s the main gist of the conversation.  Janine finally unloads about being shoved into her studies and then blamed for the extra work load.  She decides to make a little more effort to be outgoing and helpful and heads downstairs for special tea with Mimi.

The summer is winding down (as is the book) and Claudia finally apologizes to Mimi for giving her the stroke with her behavior.  Mimi straightens Claudia out and we see shades of the old Mimi return.  Claudia is glad to have her grandmother back.

Okay, remember this quote from the beginning of the blog? “Mrs. Kishi says Claudia isn’t fair sometimes – that inside, Janine is sensitive and loving and creative in her own way but Claudia doesn’t look past the big words to see it.  She also says Janine wishes she was more like Claudia with lots of friends and interests and that’s why she teases Claudia.”  By the end of the book, that’s the conclusion Claudia comes to.  Just goes to show you that you can tell your kids whatever you want, but they still have to learn it the hard way.

Mommy Moments (there aren’t too many in the early books)

• Okay, Kishis, I get that you’re excited Janine is so smart, but did it occur to you that maybe pushing her into her books all the time is one of the reasons she has a hard time communicating with others?
• Dear parents of Stoneybrook, never, never, never compare your children to each other.  Don’t say, “You should be more like so and so; they get their work done on time and yada yada yada.”  You’re just asking for that child to grow up and become a serial killer.  Or the kid who never leaves your couch.
• Again, Kishis, why didn't you ask Janine to stay with Mimi instead of Mary Anne?  It's not easy being at your weakest in front of a next door neighbor, especially one who is the same age as your granddaughter.

 General Comments

• Okay, at the beginning of the series, Jenny P is a bigger pain than Karen, but not by much.  Later on that precocious blonde fireball turns into a snotty, self-centered brat.
• In Mary Anne Vs Logan, Jenny P has some jealous feelings toward her new sister, but the sitters portray it as being snotty and bratty.  Here they all feel sorry for Jamie Newton.  As I recall, Jenny never attempted to dump punch on Andrea; she just wanted the stork to take her back.  You can tell who the sitters like best.

Claudia Outfits (squeee!)

• Claudia’s favorite art class outfit: “black jeans, a giant, bright blue t-shirt and a snake bracelet that I wore above my elbow.”  Jeans?  In summer?  I know it’s the east coast and all, but I’ve been there the end of June and there will be no jeans wearing for me!
• For Lucy’s Christening party: “A big loose, white shirt with black splotches all over it, and white knee pants that came just below my knees.  My shoes were dainty gold sandals that laced partway up my legs.  Top that off with pink flamingo earrings and a pink bracelet that said CLAUDIA in heart shaped beads.”  Hair:  "I braided it into four long braids, tied a ribbon around the tops of each and fastened the ends with butterfly clips."  Holy cow.  The hair alone would send me running for cover.